Reaction to Peer Post

In Ellen's post, she analyzed Janie's supposed tendency to make poor choices in men. I strongly disagree with characterization. Rather, Janie became entrapped in two stifling, abusive, and unfulfilling relationships because of circumstances, rather than her own free will. Nanny, whether with Janie's best interests in mind or not, forced her into a marriage with Logan "tree stump" Killicks. Entrapped and desperate as she was, she can not be held accountable for her decision to run away with Joe Starks.
Once Joe dies, though, Janie gains her freedom. Ellen asserted that her short period of freedom ends when she, "although her conscience tells her not to, she allows him to come into her life and begin to dominate [her]". I disagree with this depiction of Tea Cake. I believe that her freedom allowed her to make a decision about who she lets into her life, from an advantaged position. I also believe that she chose correctly, marrying Tea Cake, a loving and kind man.
By claiming that Janie marries Tea Cake because he has dominance over her, and would have forced her anyway, denies the depth of her and Tea Cake's love for one another, and Janie her personal agency. It may be easy to fault Tea Cake for his transgressions, but Janie deserves more credit for her independence, and Tea Cake is much more complex. He gambles, is jealous at times, and even dips down to the level of domestic violence, however these flaws only show him as a round character, and ultimately a good man.
Indeed, the presence of violence in every relationship shown in the novel, the victim blaming that goes on after Janie shoots Tea Cake in self defense, and the horrendous and appalling way the men talk about beating their "women" on pages 147 and 148, are evidence that violence towards women is an unfortunate feature of society, especially of that time, and often of the black community. While Tea Cake in no way deserves a free pass for his actions, he is more a product of his time, than a bad man.

I, actually, really enjoyed reading about Tea Cake and Janie's relationship. They are honest with each other, and both have bouts of insecurities and jealousies, just as real couples do. Their fighting is more indicative of how much they care about each other than any true resentment or struggle for dominance.
One instance that struck me, was how Janie wore blue because Tea Cake liked it. Ellen saw this as a display of dominance, but I thought about it quite differently. Unlike Joe, who kept Janie's beauty locked up and hidden away, Tea Cake celebrates Janie's beauty by letting her know how pretty she looks in blue, and helps her feel secure in it and also take joy in it by showing herself off in blue. Both Tea Cake's compliment, and Janie's acquiescence are acts of love, rather than dominance and submission. I know that, for instance, I wear contacts when I go out with my girlfriend because she doesn't like glasses hiding my green eyes. It isn't that she is dictating what I do, or that I'm being subservient. Instead, I do this for her because it makes me feel beautiful and loved, and makes her feel special and loved because I'll do this for her.
Additionally, one can see that Tea Cake makes no pretense of dominating Janie because he is willing to be emotionally vulnerable with her. He asks her to take care of him, and he cries in her lap. The times in which he does have dominance, for instance when he saves her in the flood, is no simple "damsel in distress" stereotype, but a selfless act of love.
I know, it's surprising to hear the feminist not being cynical about male demonstrations of dominance and heterosexual relationship mores, but I really believed in Tea Cake and Janie, as a couple. I thought their story was beautiful.